The Breaking of Relationship
I am often asked by people what it means to be ‘living in sin.’ Phrases like this are often used so loosely and frequently in our culture that very little thought is given to their actual meaning. Typically, what is being asked in regards to this particular phrase is, ‘am I breaking any rules?’
I understand where that comes from in that the way in which many of us experience the day to day of life around us has become, largely… secular. By secular, I mean that we have really become reduced to things… with a function.
Jobs become things with a function.
Gadgets become things with a function.
Education becomes a thing with a function.
Relationships become things with a function.
It’s really a sad state of affairs for us as people when we are able to effortlessly look around us and functionalize everything. In that context, if we are lacking in how we measure up functionally, we understand that something is, and try to determine what rule we are breaking so that we can fix it… and find value again that will lighten the blow of the sins we feel we have committed.
It is tragic when we are constantly looking at our job and its demands as something that we can’t measure up with.
It is tragic when we understand that our many gadgets are taking over our lives… or are outdated… and we can’t break away from the way in which we wish we could use them better.
It is tragic when that education that we invested so much time and energy isn’t producing the dream that we’d hoped would follow.
It is tragic when our relationships get reduced to simply meeting needs in a convenient way that leave us feeling like roommates sharing responsibilities to keep things running smoothly.
Truth be told, if areas of life have been reduced to their basic functions with no meaning beyond that… we are ‘living in sin’… despite your best efforts to optimize on their functionality.
This is most painful in the area of relationships. Ask any couple who has been together long enough to reach a point where they would define their life together as something that is ‘convenient’ if they can pinpoint one functional area that they could improve, and you will soon discover that the matter runs much deeper.
Even the most optimized of functional relationships can be completely hollow when it comes to a shared purpose. This is ‘living in sin’. The relationship has been broken of its nature and purpose… it is no longer sacred.
Sin… is not the breaking of a rule… it is the breaking of a relationship.
If you are asking yourself the question, ‘am I living in sin?’… do not first look to things that you can ‘do’ better. Take time to identify the where nature and purpose have been lost. Stop everything until you are able to clear through the fog of ‘things’ in the relationship… reduce the importance of functionality.
Get back the heart of the matter.